TAKE CHARGE OF DISCONTENT

Discontent is a noun that needs no descriptors. Adjectives need not apply. One would not say dejected discontent; it’s implied. One would not say happily discontented unless describing a particular behavior in the Psychiatric ward. Discontent, in and of itself, is a negative word standing on the prairie of our horizon. So why do we experience it?

As a mortgage person you have many answers to that question. Such as the discontent that arises because of a yo-yo interest rate market where borrowers either double app and fund elsewhere or panic when rates rise and don’t fund at all! There is discontent in every dwindling commission check. There is discontent on bill paying day.

Are we just talking money here or is there also discontent in your life over lack of joy? Lack of excitement or general well being? Lets examine discontent as if it were a coin with two sides. Heads and tails. Call the bet as the coin sails through the air to fall at random – negatively or positively. If that scenario were exactly your life it would mean that you have no control over whether or not you experience happiness or sadness. As a mortgage expert you are more than likely a ‘control freak’ and letting life ‘flip your coin’ means loss of control – very uncomfortable indeed!

Manage discontent and take control of life

The first step in managing discontent is to take ownership of the coin and ‘flip it between your fingers’. There is no one better than you to determine what you need to accomplish everyday and set forth doing it. There is no one better than you to decide that you will have a positive attitude or negative cynicism. Never permit things to just ‘happen’ to you. For example, what would you do in this case?

You have reservations for a three-day industry trade show in a lovely coastal city. The hotel reservationist says you will get an ocean view room, “We have plenty, not to worry!” But when you open your hotel door and slide back the drapes you see the back of another hotel with a kiddy pool right below your window. You:

• become very disappointed and unpack knowing you’ll be out of the room in a day or two and you hated the idea of coming to the stupid conference anyway and besides this hotel stinks!
b.
• Not allow your surroundings to drag you down but unpack humming a little tune knowing you can see the beach up close anyway on your morning run.
c.
• Pick up the phone, and taking control, ask for a new room – one with a view and don’t stop until you get it.

If you chose B or C you are in agreement that there is seldom a reason to allow others or events to dictate how we should act. No one has the right to make another feel inferior, although there are many among us who make it a habit to try and do just that. Many times it may be your best friends who will attempt to keep you from improving yourself. They may try to show you how foolish you are to set lofty goals or move in a new direction. These friends won’t mind giving you advice ‘in your best interest’ of course. When I founded SRS I had a few friends who tried to dissuade me. They did it out of love for me and fear for my future.

However, only we ourselves, personally, can know the power of ‘self’. The courage to listen to the inner voice of reason may help you discover the abilities and talents you never knew you had and that your potential is far greater than you had dreamed. The courage to be self directed also means not blaming everything that happens to you on someone else - a major step in managing discontent. When you turn discontent into positive power, manage it well and act upon it, you have found the most driving force for personal happiness. Many fortuitous people know personal happiness is the root of their success. Choosing to make lemonade with life’s lemons keeps you from becoming resentful. Peace of mind is attained when you can stop reacting to what other people think, the newspapers doom and gloom viewpoint, or stock market fears and concentrate instead upon your own actions.

Everyday there are many decisions to be made, even if the decision is to do nothing! You can decide to allow external influences or other people to keep you perpetually discontented or you can decide to become the manager of your discontent aka master of your own life. What a great way to begin each new day!

Client Tip ID: 10